Midlife "Crisis"

cri⋅sis  /ˈkraɪsɪs/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [krahy-sis] Show IPA noun, plural -ses  /-siz/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [-seez] Show IPA ,

3. a dramatic emotional or circumstantial upheaval in a person's life.

I would love to embark on a historical search to determine just who, exactly, coined the phrase, "Midlife Crisis."  My guess is the person was some sort of pessimistic pychologist who needed a label to go with some poor saps malady.  It's only a guess.  I have no way to substantiate the claim.

My point is this.  Why is it necessary that changes we make throughout life have to be labeled a "crisis".  On more than one occasion over the last ten years or so, someone has asked me if I was going through just such an event.  It took me quite some time to realize that midlife isn't a crisis.....it's an AWAKENING!!  Most all of us are at least vaguely familiar with the old adage, "youth is wasted on the young."  It wasn't until I reached the age of 40 or so that I came to learn exactly what that term meant.

At "midlife" (which surely is defined differently for everyone.  We don't KNOW how long we're going to live) we become painfully aware that life on earth, as we know it, is finite.  The door is swinging out, not in. That's not a BAD thing.  For me, it was a GOOD thing.  "Why?", you may ask.  I'll try to explain. 

At 40 years old, I purchased my first Harley Davidson motorcycle.  I'd wanted one since I was a kid, but was just too dang responsible to purchase such an elaborate toy.  Because of that purchase, I've been able to experience the trip of a lifetime with good friends.  At 48, I continue to work out almost daily.  It hurts when I run.  My knees ache and I just don't have the stamina I once had.  When I lift weights it sometimes feels like my shoulders are about to come out of the socket and I'm clearly not as strong as I was when I was 25.  But I do it.  Why?  Because I can.  I've come to appreciate the fact that life is for the living. 

I recently made another "irresponsible" purchase.  Without exception, everyone I know has said, "Wow, I wish I could do that."  My question to them is, "Then why don't you?"  If not now, when?  I've made an enormous number of mistakes in my life.  I've been married more than twice (we need not delve into a math lesson).  I don't have a big house.  My credit isn't in the 800's.  In fact, I don't think it's even in the 700's.  I've taken big trips, bought elaborate toys and spent on impulse.  Why? Because I can.  Many people I know are living in much nicer homes and are going to have much more comfortable retirements.  But that's just money.  I'm betting I'm going to have a lot more fun!

I'm not suggesting that the answer for you is leaving your wife/husband and buying a Ferrari.  I'm only suggesting that as we actually see there is, indeed, an end to THIS life, it becomes sweeter.  I allow myself small luxuries I wouldn't have in my 20's, because I don't feel the weight of society's rules about responsibilities on my shoulder.  I guess I just care less what people think. Have you ever noticed how elderly people clearly speak what's on their mind?

At every turn since approaching "midlife", I've learned new things, faced new challenges, and slayed new dragons.  It truly has been an awakening.  And as long as I live, I pray that every day will be some form of awakening for me.  Christian, Muslim, Buddhist or Atheist, I think we can all agree that there is only one of these lives, in this body, on this earth.  As you live your life, awaken your spirit to new possibilities. 

Life is a garden.  Dig it.